I was about five or six when I first became aware of how others perceived my ‘sensitivity’. At that tender age, the concept of sensitivity was a mystery to me, yet it felt like a shadow—a deep character flaw I was expected to fix without understanding how.
Growing up in a three-generational household was both a blessing and a challenge. My grandparents, an aunt, an uncle, a cousin, and my own family of five all shared one roof. Our home, headed by my bachelor Uncle, was a beacon of hospitality, always open to cousins and relatives from near and far—a typical South Asian family culture. Yet, amidst this lively environment, I often felt overwhelmed. Simple things—uncomfortable clothing that irritated my skin, a passing look of disapproval or a teasing/ critical remark by someone —could trigger what others viewed as temper tantrums or a total emotional breakdown.
While my childhood was rich with joy and love, it also held its share of trials. My caregivers often struggled with my heightened emotions, thus opting to leave me to find solace on my own most of the time. This often left me feeling emotionally abandoned, confused and unloved. My siblings, too, found my sensitivity challenging. My sister, just a year older, would distance herself, leaving me feeling rejected, isolated and excluded.
Reflecting on those times, it is no wonder that I treated my own sensitivity as a burden I needed to bear with or exile to the deep recesses of my psyche so that I would no longer be regarded with derision or contempt by others who saw my sensitivity as a flaw or weakness.
But of course, for anyone who is sensitive, you would probably be aware that our sensitive nature is not something we can get rid of or exile completely just because a part of us deeply desires to.
I wonder then: how do we learn to embrace our sensitivity as a strength rather than a burden? In navigating these complexities, I’ve learned that what once felt like a flaw can be transformed into a path towards deeper self-understanding and connection.
In a world that often feels overwhelming and dysregulating for our nervous systems, understanding the essence of sensitivity can be a profound journey towards embracing our unique strengths and finding meaningful ways to be of service in this world by honouring our sensitivity.
Click here to continue reading what it means to be sensitive, the roots of high sensitivity and the signs of being a highly sensitive person (HSP)
Reflect on your own journey with sensitivity:
- How do you currently experience your sensitivity?
- If sensitivity currently feels like a struggle for you, how might you begin to see this trait as a strength rather than a hindrance?
- What steps can you take to honour your sensitivity while engaging fully with the world around you?
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Reader, if you’re a sensitive, I would love to know what resonated with you and what didn’t, or if you might have even more questions around your sensitive nature that you’d like to ask - hit reply, and let me know.
With your well-being at heart,
Elia Kanak Rajah [she/her]
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